Well What'dya Expect?

President Bush ran nearly the entire gamut of personality during his recent stop in Germany.

First, an introspective President Bush said he has no regrets about invading Iraq and toppling Saddam Hussein in 2003. While he lamented his choice of words prior to the invasion, Bush maintained that the invasion has made the world a safer place.

Second, In a rare display of humility, Bush admitted regret over his usage of cliches such as "Bring em' on" and "Wanted: Dead or Alive" during the run up to the war. Bush said that using such phrases did not portray him as a man of peace.

Imagine that. According to Bush, if only he had chosen his words a little more carefully he would be remembered as a man of peace. That whole illegal invasion and subsequent occupation of two sovereign countries thing? Shrug. Reckless expansion of the American surveillance state and simultaneous usurpation of individual freedoms? Whatever. Millions of people have been slaughtered, injured, displaced, and/or emaciated in his ludicrous "War on Terror" and the only regret he has is rooted in semantics?

Third, peaceful Bush replaced the humble, introspective Bush when the topic of Iran was broached. In order to prove he has learned from mistakes, Bush toned down his rhetoric when speaking about the "threat" Iran's nuclear program posed to the "free" world. Using the safe, bi-partisan approved line that "all options are on the table" in forcing Iran to halt its nuclear program, peacemaker Bush stated that the choice between increased isolation and integration into the world economy was Tehran's.

But warmonger Bush won the day. Bush remarked that present sanctions on Iran should be enforced, and allies should work together to strengthen those sanctions of Iran fails to capitulate to the demands of the "free world."

So there you have it. A session with enough range in personality to baffle any government-licensed psychoanalyst. Of course, Bush's saber-rattling has become so familiar to Americans as to call it cliche. Who knows, though - perhaps even Dubya grows tired of his own BS and therefore decided to throw a curveball to the crowd by being coy?